a hound dog's guide to graceland too

in holly springs, ms, there is a magical place, the home to one of the quirkiest men i've ever met and the resting place of enough elvis memorabelia to sink a small ship. let me describe the steps to a hypothetical visit to graceland too...

1. drink with friends on friends' porch (as is MTC tradition) until at least 11 pm, at which point the group must decide to go on an adventure
2. crash the local high school's prom, during which at least one student should come up to a teacher to tell him or her that they can "smell liquor on yo' breath"
3. knock on the door to graceland too at approximately 12:15 am, which absolutely will not bother the graceland too curator, as the place is open 24-7 (proper hours for a shrine)
4. take the tour of the elvis memorabelia; stop occassionally to "ooh" and "aah" at the pictures of celebrities who have become lifetime members of the graceland too museum (thus enabling them to visit for FREE)
5. listen to elvis music as you walk through the house/museum/shrine
6. giggle at elvis stories, told with reverence by the character (in a positive way) running the museum
7. gasp in shock as the sixth person in your party (an aunt posing as a barbie) gives a random elvis doll a blowjob to top off the evening
8. return to original porch, continue to drink and/or smoke
9. spy on friends as they have drunken make-out session on couch
10. two months later, look back at the evening with fond recollection and smile

only two more trips until the hypothetical people above can become lifetime members, just like chris o'donnell and duncan gray IV... can you feel the excitement? :)