i'm so confused. boys are so freaking stupid with their mixed signals. i sometimes feel like we need a translater; each person would be given one to use with each member of the opposite sex, and relationships would begin to function at a higher level. okay, so here's the deal. on tuesday night, i went over to a friend's house (the boy's house, too) to do laundry and work on my lesson plans (which were due on wednesday to ole miss). of course, i was totally distracted by this great conversation with the boy, and i wound up only getting one day done. but the conversation was terrific, and we have so much in common intellectually. unfortunately, there are so many other levels to relationships that i just don't think we'd ever work out in real life. spiritually, we believe in a lot of the same things, except that he's much more dogmatic than i am (he's baptist, it comes with the territory). physically, i don't know how we'd work together (especially with the whole religiously dogmatic aspect of his spiritual life). AAAACK!!!!!!!!! stupid boys. so, here's the thing. i've had all of the "self-improvement" time i can take. i think i'm pretty balanced. i'm ready to move on with my life now.... now that i'm in the middle of BFE. this is ridiculous. RIDICULOUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and my friends are slowly, but surely hooking up with other people around them. i went to a TFA party last night, and i knew about 6 people there, none of whom i'm particularly close to, and none of the boys were overly appealling. i almost forgot to mention why i need a translater. so at this party last night, the same boy who was totally into conversing with me on tuesday night was totally NOT into me last night. it sucked. this is just silly. where are the guitar-playing, hippie-minded, free-loving, zaftig-loving, spiritually-inclined intellectual men? am i really, truly asking for too much? i don't think i deserve anything less than those qualities in somebody that i love. this sucks. at least there's a party tonight, with my friends, all of whom i love (even if it's in a distinctly non-sexual, non-romantic way). more later...