i feel kind of bipolar today. my students are all over the place, and i'm running with them emotionally. four glimpses into some of my students' lives (from today)...

the student that dropped out of school to pursue the full-time job came back today. he's in ISS and dealing with all of the mess he left behind him, but he's back. i can't even begin to tell you how happy i am that he chose to return. i couldn't stop smiling at him today when i visited ISS, and he grinned at me when i told him how he'd made me happy. he's working on his missed assignments and is trying to catch up, and i have so much respect for that decision to accept responsibility and a better future. he'll be okay.

one of my students who is failing my class because she hasn't turned in work for most of the semester told me yesterday that her mother wanted to talk to me during my planning period today. so i waited... and waited... and waited. when i asked the student about it during her class period, she said that her mom had had a hair appointment and that she would see me after school. so, again, i waited... and waiting... and waited. another no-show. priorities. if my kid was failing a subject, i'd be all over it - not at a freakin' HAIR appointment. she better have been getting some kind of gold weaved into her hair today. how can my students deal with this type of flakey parent? and why the hell would you go through with a pregnancy if you weren't willing to make that child your first, most, and absolute priority???? i just don't understand.

my heartbreak today... i get upset just thinking about it. last quarter, i had a student who pulled a 25% in my class. he could have done much, much better, but he decided that he'd rather skip my class than worry about doing the work. i pulled him aside at the beginning of this quarter and told him that i wasn't going to allow him to fail on my watch. well, i've done a miserable job of it. he's failing all of his classes (including mine), and he's just basically been expelled for skipping classes. after he heard that he was probably going to be expelled, he had to go back to class (in the resource room, where he's getting tutoring), where he burst into tears as soon as he entered. he's so smart that he really could be a huge, raging success, and he's going to be expelled for doing a stupid thing. and how the hell does the punishment fit the crime here? i mean, really, we're going to tell the kid that he needs to be in class by kicking him out of SCHOOL???? AAAAAHHHHH!!!!! delta logic. i'm angry and disappointed and i feel let down - not just by him, but also by myself for not being on him and also the principal for making such a stupid call. i wish you could see this kid. i wish that everybody and their brother could see this light in my life, this kid with such screaming potential. and he's being robbed. the thing that pisses me off the most is that there are people - teachers - who would rather see somebody like him gone as opposed to in their classes because he might bring down their test scores. fucking idiots. he's not a goddamn test score!!!!!! he's intelligence and kindness, and, yes, he makes mistakes, but he is a KID. he's supposed to screw up every so often. i can't talk about this anymore. i have to move on to another highlight.

my fourth, and final, kid story of the evening... one of my seniors, a bright, shining, talented, wonderful student, was pulled out of class by the art teacher today. when he came back in the class, he was absolutely giddy, saying that he was going to take her to college with him too (i'm the other teacher he's taking with him). he wouldn't tell the other students what she had told him, but he was just full of joy. so i did what any teacher would do. i pulled him outside, gave him a hug and demanded an explanation for his joy. apparently, he had told the art teacher that he wished he had a sketch pad, but that he just couldn't afford one and couldn't find one in indianola. so, over thanksgiving, she bought him one and gave it to him, with the stipulation that he pay her back on graduation day. she thought she was just doing an art-teacher thing, but it meant the world to him. amazing. so, after he told me the story, he ran after her and gave her a huge hug, too. i can't wait to hear what he does with his life.

enough teacher stuff. i'm feeling a little less manic-depressive now. i just needed to air out some of this stuff before i headed off to bed. i may write another blog and share what happened when we visited my grandmother in the nursing home and tell you about the kitten that erin and i found on the highway, but i'll probably do that a bit later. g'night. me